Binders Full of Women And (More) Things I Don't Care About

I've mentioned this before, but there are still a great many things in this world about which I do not care.  Now, to be fair, I'm not exactly the model for caring about stuff.  At any given time in my life, there are a few things and/or people that I care about very much, and everything else can pretty much go fuck itself.  So, I wouldn't suggest that everybody should not care about the same things I don't care about, but there are some things that make me wonder why anybody would care about them.  Like...

The superbowl halftime show.  I'm done with this, OK?  Beyonce is great, and maybe she'll bring her husband and that would be even better.  And maybe he'll bring some people he's worked with in the past.  I'm not saying I won't enjoy the Beyonce/Jay-Z/Rihanna/Eminem halftime show, I'm just saying I don't care.  My superbowl Sunday wouldn't really be any worse if they had just decided to dig up another bunch of fossils to throw on the stage. 

You know why?  Because you know what always sucks no matter how good the artist is?  A fifteen minute concert in front of a crowd that may or may not even like the performer because that's not what they came to see.  Especially since halftime is the best time for the crowd to go pee and get more beer and a nacho refill.  Even when The Who played it wasn't really that good, and they've been practicing ever since they played the halftime show at the Civil War (which was also terrible and caused President Lincoln to quickly declare "Christ this is awful, can we just get back to killing each other?").

Speaking of sports, I don't care about any summer sport once football starts.  Seriously.  Baseball, NASCAR, golf, whatever else i forced myself to watch all summer in the gap between hockey and football; please stop.  All of you need to have your championships in late August or on Labor Day weekend and then you need to shut up and watch football like the rest of us. 

If you don't care that nobody is watching, then just think about your poor athletes.  Baseball players have to spend three hours every Sunday in September playing baseball instead of watching football.  NASCAR drivers don't get to watch football until some time in November.  Don't those leagues feel bad about that?  They should.

I don't care if Lance Armstrong cheated.  First of all, seriously, who gives a shit?  He cheated in a French bicycle race.  Read that last sentence a few times and ask yourself what part of that should matter to anyone.  I never liked Lance Armstrong that much anyway, but hasn't he raised like eleventy billion dollars for cancer research?  But now fuck him because he was the one guy in cycling who was taking performance-enhancing drugs, except for, ya know, EVERY OTHER FUCKING PERSON IN THE SPORT!?! 

The chances of a Tour de France winner eventually getting stripped of the title for using performance enhancers are basically the same as the chances of everything that John Calipari does at Kentucky eventually being vacated for recruiting violations.  Like 98%.  Cycling is a perfect example of why sports really need to think twice and make sure they really want to know what's going on before they start with a testing program.  But somehow Lance Armstrong is now a big evil man.  I don't understand people sometimes.

I still don't care about reality TV.  I mentioned this last time http://somethingclever13.blogspot.com/2009/12/things-i-dont-care-about.html but it's only getting worse.  The Learning Channel used to air legit valuable television about science and stuff.  Now it's amish people in New York City and honey boo boo.  When I was a kid, the Real World San Francisco was the best thing I'd ever seen on TV, and it's been all downhill from there for reality TV.  Where's Puck when you need him? 

The bigger point is, by replacing actual, valuable, educational TV, reality shows on channels like TLC are, literally, making us dumber.  To paraphrase; honey boo boo, you are one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever seen. At no point in your rambling, incoherent nonsense are you ever close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this country is now dumber for having experienced you. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.

Finally, I don't care about Mitt Romney's binder o' hoes, er, I mean, binders full of women.  Honestly, we all know what he was talking about and it wasn't anything offensive.  He just worded it a little strangely, which is kind of his thing.  Ginning up outrage over some stupid little comment is the Republicans' thing, and when the Democrats try it they pretty much always fail miserably. 

More importantly, wasn't the actually bad part when Romney suggested that a necessary part of hiring women is making sure you let them leave in time to go cook dinner?  I mean, you wouldn't want the hard working husbands of the women you hire out of pity to come home after a long day of working way past 5 just to find an empty table because you kept their wives at work too late.  Is it even possible for dinner to happen without a woman cooking it?  I don't know, and Mitt doesn't want to find out.

And what about all the other stupid things Mitt said Tuesday night?  He said his answer to gun violence in America involves 1) not ever considering any new gun legislation, but 2) telling people who have babies to get married.  This one statement alone should disqualify anyone from holding any kind of public office, but somehow binders full of women gets more press. 

Did you also notice how Mitt quickly threw in that the two parents had to be a mother and a father?  The only thing Republicans hate more than single moms is multiple homosexuals.  Ya know, as far as I know, Mitt had a mom and a dad, and he still turned out pretty useless.  Maybe it's time for the country to stop taking family planning advice from these idiots.